get by

"I'm lowering my overhead, finally and it feels nice to know there will soon be fewer monthly demands on my cash flow." I said.

"So do you think you'll get another car then?"

"No, why would I do that? I live in the city, and the point is to be paying out less every month and be able to save; you know, in case I want some sort of future security or something wacky like that." I replied.

"Oh."

That's it? Oh? I was thinking that my friend, who is also struggling financially (albeit with the cushion of a large inheritance), might be on the same page. The realistic, something-must-be-done page. As I'm coming to realize however, many, if not most people these days, are blissfully unaware of both where their paychecks go and how urgent it is to create a financial future for oneself, independent of our beleaguered social security system.

I dream about bigger paychecks, for sure, but while I toil to set myself up for such a blessing, I feel quite certain that lowering my overall expenses is the way to go. This is much easier said than done when residing in, or anywhere near Manhattan. Being the resourceful girl that I am however, I think I've done a fine job thus far, so I'm motivated to continue. In fact, I've taken several positive steps already.

Car: gone. After the car company finishes fucking me over with a large "return charge" and a $500 penalty for a rock that nicked the windshield, I will be free and clear of a large drain on my income. Sunny days ahead on that front.

Credit cards: paying down aggressively. In fact, I'm within only a few thousand dollars of eradicating nearly all of the credit card debt I incurred while training all those years, without the climax of realizing my athletic dreams.

Student loans: Okay I'm close to having the first round paid off, but I am signing up for a shitload more, so that celebration has to be tabled for about a half decade. Nonetheless, I've been diligently paying off my expensive (and worthwhile) undergraduate education and am nearing the homestretch in my quest not to owe anyone money for my brain's contents.

And yet.....

I look at my income, which is nearly double what it was 2 years ago, and somehow I've managed to get myself into worse financial shape. How is this possible? For a second there, I started to get really pissed at my parents. They are, arguably, the worst money managers in history, because my family should have been much better off than we are, collectively. This may explain, however, why several of us kids are off trying for post graduate degrees in order not to put our future offspring through the "no, you can't have it because we're not rich" speech.

The funny thing about the "we're not rich" speech, is that it applied to every single subject you could imagine. Stupid subjects fell under the "not rich" umbrella and subsequently, the children of my family were constantly confused and in awe of simple things other people took as a given.

"Mom, can we get Golden Grahams for breakfast this week?"

"No," She would say and then turn away in disgust, "We're not rich."

Huh?

So, I grew up thinking that only rich people had name brand foods, milk that wasn't powdered and used paper towels instead of rotating cloth ones and washing them every few days (because paper towels are "like throwing money away"). I thought that only rich people got a new car or flew in an airplane or ever dreamed of having anything nice for themselves. We weren't rich, so to want for something nice or even bordering on decent, was considered selfish in my house.

The conclusion I have come to in the last several years is that that is all a bunch of bullshit. There is no nobility in poverty. There is nothing wrong with setting yourself up and enjoying what you have. Lowering my bottom line now and living slightly more meagerly will actually bode well for me in the near future and I'll be able to do "rich people" things like travel and enjoy life. I can live with that.....I do it now on a pauper's budget, so imagine what lies ahead.

I'm rich, biaaatch!