By the title, this could easily be a post about idiot men and broken promises and all of that nonsense that's been reported since the beginning of time. It isn't, however.
This is instead about idiot Boss and Boss's stupid requests and frequent temper tantrums and explosive anger over things Boss never even asked for. Todays outbursts featured a request that was emailed at 7am for lunch reservations at Bergdorf Goodman's 7th floor restaurant. Having never been to Bergie's - because what's the fucking point in that - I wondered what lunch in a super duper high end department store in Midtown would cost. Here is the menu. While some of the items look delicious, it's lunch! On a Monday! Anyway, the request was sent in at 7am and I arrive at work at 8:30am. At 8:38, Boss (who will not show up until almost 11) emails me frantically to ask me why the request has not been filled so that Boss and Boss's friend can go and kibbutz and then charge it on the company's dime. Clearly there is nothing more important for me to do first thing on a Monday than make lunch reservations at some swanky place at 8:30 in the morning so Boss can have a two hour lunch. Clearly.
The one that really got me though, was the reaction to my completion of a project for which I had been given detailed, handwritten instructions. I followed the instructions to the letter. The project was completed last week - ahead of schedule - and was done to the exact directions I was given. To boot, I attached the handwritten instructions to the back of the completed project so that Boss could peruse the changes and see if there were further amendments to be made. Rather than take a gander at Boss's own notes, Boss took one quick scan of the docs and came charging out of the office, papers waving wildly and at an elevated pitch scolded me for not removing some clauses and for generally sucking due to an obvious lack of attention to the detailed instructions provided to me.
Lucky for me, everyone knows boss is a lunatic. Not lucky for me, but interesting to note, is that Boss didn't provide the instructions that induced the hysteria. Nary an email, post-it, sheet of paper nor word was provided with the second set of items. So now I suck because I'm not a mind-reader. Hmmm....I've been down this road before.
I've decided that I'm just working for the bonus, while carefully crafting other plans. I do plan to visit the psychic who sits out in her folding chair eating gummy snacks and staring daggers into passersby for not stopping for some kookery, so that maybe I can at least have a heads up next time the tree guy fucks up at Boss's house and sends Boss off the deep end (or in the event of any similar scenario), so I'll know to come to the office in full mental kevlar. This way, I'll at least have the benefit of a heads up and be able to bite my tongue better.
Today I said "so what you're telling me is that despite the fact that you didn't say anything about any of that at any point in time, I've done a shit job."
"You need to be more detail oriented, is what I'm telling you."
"Despite the complete absence of information?"
With this there was a heavy sigh. The kind that says "yes, I know you're correct here, but I'm going to continue being an asshole, rather than submit."
Fucking looney bin.
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