borrowed

I can't really say it much better than this, so here is a brilliant, borrowed analogy from that clever girl "anonymous", for what is happening in my city, as I type.

Relevant Analogy: Bill Is A Fucking Jackass

holygoddamnshitballs:

I’ve been trying to find the original author of this piece and I’ve been unsuccessful so far. It’s a hilarious allegory to the current ACA aka Obamacare hoopla.

So, Imagine that the company you work for held a poll, and asked everyone if they thought it would be a good idea to put a soda machine in the break room. The poll came back, and the majority of your colleagues said “Yes”, indicating that they would like a soda machine. Some said no, but the majority said yes. So, a week later, there’s a soda machine.

Now imagine that Bill in accounting voted against the soda machine. He has a strong hatred for caffeinated soft drinks, thinks they are bad you you, whatever. He campaigns throughout the office to get the machine removed. Well, management decides “OK, we’ll ask again” and again, the majority of people say “Yes, lets keep the soda machine.”

Bill continues to campaign, and management continues to ask the employees, and every time, the answer is in favor of the soda machine. This happens, lets say… 35 times. Eventually, Bill says “OK, I’M NOT PROCESSING PAYROLL ANYMORE UNTIL THE SODA MACHINE IS REMOVED”, so nobody will get paid unless management removes the machine.

What should we do???

Answer: Fire Bill and get someone who will do the fucking job.

Bonus: Bill tells everyone that he was willing to “Negotiate”, to come to a solution where everyone got their payroll checks, but only so long as that negotiation capitulated to his demand to remove the soda machine.

Bill is a fucking jackass.

a chuckle

In today's episode of things I find hilarious, I happened upon the following quote, which comes from a "blog" I check in on occasionally for a good laugh, due to the omnipresent douchiness and anger presented within. 

"When attractive women post photos of themselves being hugged and kissed by shirtless guys, regardless of the relationship, it kind of corrupts them in my eyes and makes them a little gross."

This is hilarious, because the writer of said quote hasn't been able to take his shirt off in public for the last 20 years, because he is pasty, rotund and unattractively pileous.  It makes perfect sense then, to just make fun of people who know how to eat logical portion sizes and take care of themselves, in an effort to retain that thin tether of self-perceived superiority.  

I love funny stuff.

365

I got to meet chef Jose Andres last week.  It was one of those moments that proved me to be the nerd I am.  I'd rather meet chefs and athletes in obscure sports, than movie stars or celebrities, any day.  Maybe it's a function of where I grew up and the proximity to film, tv and music stars and all their nonsense.  Either way, I had good food, a serrano-infused margarita and got photographic evidence of my geeked-out-ness, all while catching up with a kid (actually now an adult with a very adult job) that I used to coach.  

So that was fun.  It was also nothing more than a momentary reprieve from a subject that has been on my mind constantly for the last couple of weeks.  

I should also mention that I got to see the President speak, from less than a fifty foot distance, inside the Marine Barracks yard last Sunday.  I'd rather have heard him speaking under pretty much any other circumstances than the ones which entailed me supporting my dear friend and his coworkers from the third floor of building 197 at the Navy Yard, however.  

This all keeps happening.  And then nothing happens.  And then we get news headlines like "worst mass murder tragedy since December 2012".  Really?  We can't even make it a full, calendar year without mass murders anymore?  

You know, I had a bunch of stuff to say on this subject and now I'm just too disgusted and disturbed to even detail it.  Fuck this shit.